Our most important job – Proper Correction

Well, here we go. Let the debate begin. Do we spank? Timeout? Grounding? The Bible is clear that we are expected to correct and train our kids in the right way. And we are to do so in a loving way. And yes, I have used all of the above as well as having the kids muck pastures and horse stalls to get my point across.

Proverbs 10:17
17 Whoever heeds instruction is on the path to life,
but he who rejects reproof leads others astray.

Proverbs 13:24
24 Whoever spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.[a]

One of the first words our kids learn is “no.” It is also one of the first words they truly understand. It’s important that we use this word judiciously and appropriately throughout the 18 years they are in our homes. Dr. Greg put another word in there that is equally as important yet often less used – “come.” We need to have our kids come to us and have real conversations about why we’ve guided them in a certain direction. It is even more important as they enter their teenage years and start developing their own version of their faith, morals and standards.

When we must correct, there are 3 important elements involved:
First, it must be calm. We cannot always react out of anger and effectively correct our kids.
Proverbs 29:11
11 A fool gives full vent to his spirit,
but a wise man quietly holds it back.

Second, it must be timely. When we have babies, this is critical because they don’t connect the dots 20 minutes later. However, it is equally important in the teenage years. Immediate consequences have a greater impact on the rhythm of life and the lesson sets in better.
Proverbs 13:13
13 Whoever despises the word brings destruction on himself,
but he who reveres the commandment will be rewarded.

Finally, it must be judicious. A life sentence for stealing chewing gum yields nowhere to go for a larger offense. But a slap on the wrist for getting caught with alcohol or drugs will not stop the bad behavior.
Colossians 3:20-21
20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.

We can all work harder at this every day. I know this is where I struggle most as a parent and will be a topic for future blog series.